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If People Food was like Pet Food

Sarcasm. If people food was like pet food…

Sarcasm. If people food was like pet food…

If people food was like pet food, food would be sold in two categories; People Food Grade and People Feed Grade. People Feed Grade food would be allowed to violate federal law, but no one would ever know it because food labels look identical. FDA would allow meat from diseased animals and non-slaughtered animals into ‘ready-to-eat’ People Feed Grade food – believing that the material is safe as long as it’s cooked. FDA would allow chemical and mold contaminated fruits and vegetables, all classified as ‘Suitable for use as People Food’. Plus, FDA believes why should we fill up landfills with garbage food when one can cook the daylights out of this stuff and people can eat it?

If people food was like pet food, human jerky snacks imported from China would kill thousands of people. FDA would investigate for 8 years, but the agency would find no cause. Despite thousands of human deaths, companies continue to import jerky snacks from China. The ‘Made in China’ statement on the jerky snacks label would become smaller and more obscure as the death toll rises.

If people food was like pet food, food would be sold only as complete and balanced meals. Nutritional requirements of people food would be established by AAPFCO – the American Association of People Feed Control Officials (a group of agriculture folks who have no training in nutrition). Meat and vegetables would only be sold as part of complete ‘ready-to-eat’ meals. ‘Ready-to-eat’ meals would be made from powdered meat (people feed grade) or processed meat (could be people food grade or feed grade…no telling).

If people food was like pet food, medical students would be taught 3 hour nutrition classes by General Mills, Frito Lay, and Pizza Hut.

And…if people food was like pet food, the American Medical Association would declare all raw vegetables a threat to human health.

The video version…

 

End of sarcasm.

 

Wishing you and your pet(s) the best,

Susan Thixton
Pet Food Safety Advocate
Author Buyer Beware, Co-Author Dinner PAWsible
TruthaboutPetFood.com
Association for Truth in Pet Food

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15 Comments

15 Comments

  1. Nina Wolf

    April 8, 2016 at 12:14 pm

    You kill me. Your sense of humor just slays me. The funniest part is: IT IS ALL TRUE!

  2. Brenda

    April 8, 2016 at 12:53 pm

    Just a matter of time. It will happen and people will not be allowed to have gardens on their property. No more tomato plants on their decks, unless inspected by authorities.

    • Dianne

      April 9, 2016 at 11:22 pm

      There was a time in Britain when people were not allowed to have small gardens for their own use. If we end up in the world Monsanto envisions, I can honestly see that happening again.

  3. lili

    April 8, 2016 at 1:10 pm

    If people food were like pet food, Big Food would be allowed to put hyper-processed chronic disease-causing ingredients into food, as long as it was cooked to death. Indeed, this food would be deemed “superior” to fresh food. I’m afraid this is already the case for people food. As long as we continue to feed ourselves the processed crap that Big Food markets to us, then our pets will get the waste products of our nutrient-poor food chain.

  4. Kathryn S

    April 8, 2016 at 3:38 pm

    Actually, I’m not so sure how far away this is from the truth — what with Monsanto and GMO fish, vegs and fruits contaminating our crops and soils and killing our bees — there are lots of fruits and veggies that absorb incredible amounts of pesticides and chemical contaminants from the soil, air and water – not to mention that these products are fed to animals that subsequently end up on our tables.

  5. Lori S.

    April 8, 2016 at 3:39 pm

    Sadly, human food used to be exactly like this. Milk and meat used to be adulterated, diluted with other things, spoiled. There were no truth in labeling or advertising laws. That is precisely why the FDA and USDA were created. Not to mention the FCC and even OSHA, as food manufacturing was highly dangerous. The problem is that pet food has not kept up, and that is what we are fighting for.

  6. Sherrie Ashenbremer

    April 8, 2016 at 4:37 pm

    All this is really scary

  7. Sage

    April 8, 2016 at 5:30 pm

    Agree with NINI – very funny article!

    SOME human foods may already be in the FEED category!

    Always thought Hot Dog ingredients were dubious… then saw this USA Today article: Human DNA FOUND IN HOT DOGS! shttp://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2015/10/26/report-human-dna-found-hot-dogs/74617102/

    Gotta wonder what’s in hot dogs when HEBREW NATIONAL Brand (owned by conglomerate Con-Agra Foods by the way) boasts on the front of the package: No artificial Flavors, No Artificial Colors, No Fillers and NO BY-PRODUCTS – NO By-Products??

    If this label is honest and correct, which brands DO contain By-Products? Hmmmm

    • Sage

      April 8, 2016 at 5:31 pm

      Typo – Agree with NINA !

  8. Paula

    April 8, 2016 at 5:43 pm

    Human food not in the outer aisles of the store is pretty bad – all sorts of processed crap. Much of our meat and fish is questionable if purchased from a grocery store. Chemicals are still on our produce unless we buy organic. In the summer 90% of my food is from a CSA share at a local organic farm. The rest of the year the pups probably eat healthier than I do – Orijen freeze dried, Orijen dry and Fromm grain free. Treats of equal quality – and CSA goodies in the summer. Until people fully embrace healthy people food guessing we face a huge uphill battle for the pooches.

    Thank you for your efforts!!!!

  9. barbara m.

    April 9, 2016 at 1:27 am

    Brilliant post, and a good laugh. To Sage: News flash – Hot dogs are byproducts with 10+ nasty additives AND the FDA permits certain levels of “natural contaminants”: 200 or so bug fragments, fifteen fly eggs, a maggot, one hundred itsy bitsy bug bits and a rodent hair. Thanks, FDA, for keeping our people foods safe.

    • Sage

      April 9, 2016 at 2:15 pm

      Ha Ha – definitely FEED not Food!

  10. Teresa Johnson

    April 9, 2016 at 11:41 am

    In response to Lori S. When you think about the hidden ingredients in today’s foods (thanks largely to corporations like Monsanto) it seems we are headed, or maybe already reached, full circle.
    As I began to read this article my mind just yelled “Soilent Green! Soilent Green!” Very scary stuff indeed.
    Thanks for the work, and the humor Susan.

  11. Anthony Hepton

    April 10, 2016 at 9:00 pm

    Susan, The sorry part of this story is that while human food may be trending in the direction of pet food, pet food is already there and there is no concern on the part of the regulatory authorities, or the manufacturers, or the research institutions, or the press who are scared they might loose out on advertising dollars. Our legislators who oversee the regulators have bigger fish to fry, so it is left to us, who have social media available to us, to spread the word about the corruption that surrounds us so we can cut into the obscene profits of the Purina’s of the world.
    We may need another round of legal intervention if the class action suit against Purina continues to drag on with no effective date in sight.

  12. Cheryl Mallon-Bond

    April 11, 2016 at 4:30 pm

    Yep! You got it that right Susan!

    “It is easier to fool someone, than to convince them that they have been fooled”
    (which is a sad state of affairs!)

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